strange radiation: the pool of radiance archive
Adventures with an unreliable narrator.
« March 2007 | Main | May 2007 »
Apr 20 07: the avenging virgo sends a letter
Dear Past Perfect Tense:
I thought we were friends, but clearly I was wrong. Today’s refresher on the subtleties of your dark art has made my head hurt. I get it now, really I do, but you have taken up far too much of my day. I hate you.
Go sit in the corner with Numbers.
AV
Apr 13 07: resolution
Alas, they went with somebody from within, a guy with 10 years’ experience at the company—but apparently I was the other choice, and I didn’t make it easy for them. So that’s good. And I’ve been offered three months of very good freelance work, and people here know my name and respect my skillz. So hey, I went down swinging. If you lit any candles on my behalf, I thank you humbly.
Apr 11 07: nothing yet
Nope. No word yet on the job. I’d like to believe that the interview went very well indeed—it felt pretty good from where I was sitting—but there are lots of factors at play here and (shocking though this may be) not all of them are really under my control. Or, indeed, even related to me. I am trying to breathe deeply. Stay tuned.
Apr 4 07: mortification of the brain
I have a job interview tomorrow. To tell you about the job would be to get myself quite worked up about how much I want it. I have refused to spend the evening thinking about it. Instead I have opened the box. I have unsealed the jar. I have read the forbidden scroll.
I have listened to the song that obliterates all thought. And now I’m going to share it with you, because… well, because this is the Internet, and how can I not?
My history with the song in question begins with Matthew Baldwin, pretty okay guy and host of Defective Yeti. He’d been torturing his wife with it. His tale was funny, sure, but never having heard the song in question, I just didn’t grok it. And I had to know. Thus: The Black Eyed Peas’ “My Humps”. Possibly one of the most mind-boggling pieces of music ever written. Inane yet so very catchy. Vile yet perky. Beyond stupid yet inexplicably popular. Once you’ve heard it, you can never unhear it. But if you haven’t heard it—and I know that at least one or two of my readers will not have had the pleasure—you probably should. Go on. I’ll wait.
Right. Okay, all the above was just the warm-up, the backstory, the grim prologue. The Black Eyed Peas singing “My Humps” is not the music that devours the mind and leaves you standing in a swirly-eyed daze.1 No sirree Bob. For that, you need Alanis Morrisette doing a faux-mopey-piano-girl cover of The Black Eyed Peas’ “My Humps.” Yes, seriously. You cannot look away. The world of things recedes into velvety blankness. It’s brainwipe-in-a-jar. Five minutes after pressing ‘play,’ I was busily writing this post and I realized that I could not for the life of me remember how I’d first found this thing.2 But it’s also completely hilarious. Exactly what I needed. Thank you, Alanis.
1 My god, it’s Experiment IV. Or maybe Experiment Three-and-a-Half….
2 Okay, six minutes. The first thing I did was find a place where I could download the mp3.